Looking and Falling

You said look for you in a rainbow,

That that is a sign you're okay,

But i havent seen one in a while,

i hope your okay Mom,

I miss you alot everyday,

The worst part is when someone doesnt realize your gone,

They say ask your mom for this or that,

I cant, but i wish i could you have no idea,

you were taken to soon and it feels like you've been gone forever,

Its only been a year and a half and it feels as if im living in another world,

I miss you more and more everyday but i know your with me each step of the way,

Sometimes it feels like I've hit rock bottom with no hope of getting out,

Its tough sometimes, i struggle through the day trying to be happy but failing,

Im tired of pretending everything is fine and okay,

But you said i have perseverance and you have faith in me,

I dont want to let you down but you once said i could never let you down,

To be honest i feel lost in a crowd of people,

Im surrounded by noise and people but im alone,

My mind is clouded by darkness and im alone in silence,

I appear happy but im not and i question when,

How do i get out of this darkness i know there is a dim light somewhere,

But im searching in darkness and its like im blind,

I dont know anymore, i need to clear my head somehow,

but everything is a question when i think i have the answers,

I continue to question things, I dont know anymore...
Im full of doubt and fear, i hope for things to be better
But sometimes all hope is gone,
Thats when i feel like ive broken and im shattered into a million pieces
Everyday i put everything back together but the jaged pieces create imaginary scars,
I dont know anymore, how i cant get out of this whole of black,
I'm in free fall and i dont know when i'll land and that scares me the most.